Lessons from the top: a beginner’s guide to Bushisms

Eight years have come and gone, but the laughs and lessons continue. Historians might need a few decades to sift through the remains of George W. Bush’s ‘misunderestimated’ presidency, but the rest of us can already learn a thing or two about public speaking from this distinguished orator.

Whether you’re looking to brush up your technique or give your English grammar a bit of zing, look no further than President Bush. Here are eight techniques he perfected.

1. Spice things up with a misplaced clause now and then. A classic example: “I remember meeting a mother of a child who was abducted by the North Koreans right here in the Oval Office.”

2. Master the absurd to confuse your audience: “The people in Louisiana must know that all across our country there’s a lot of prayer – prayer for those whose lives have been turned upside down. And I’m one of them.”

2. Find an excuse to use a double negative: “They [the Taliban] have no disregard for human life.”

3. Or, just toss in a negative to hide your real meaning: “How can you possibly have an international agreement that’s effective unless countries like China and India are not full participants?” And, “A lot of times in politics you have people look you in the eye and tell you what’s not on their mind.”

4. Disregard subject verb agreement. For example: “The United States has suffered terrorist attacks on its soil, as have Russia.” 

5. Plural or singular? Who cares! Engage your audience by mixing them up: “We want people owning their home – we want people owning a businesses.”

6. Repeat yourself for maximum impact: “And in your mercies of love and mercy, you must always have a strong and reliable partner in government.” Or, “This thaw – took a while to thaw, it’s going to take a while to unthaw.”

7. Can’t find the right word? Simply substitute with a similar-sounding word and no one will be the wiser: “Anyone engaging in illegal financial transactions will be caught and persecuted.”

8. Still can’t find the right word? Just make one up: “They misunderestimated me.”